The Show Must NOT Go On
by DarkSyde
Mon May 15, 2006 at 03:39:51 AM PDT
It doesn't matter if it's apologists defending the latest incomprehensible Republican screw-up or Bush's schizophrenic immigration policy. The MO is predictably the same.
Some right wing Bozo comes out on a carefully managed stage with a spiel so ridiculous that it would really be more appropriate if presented by a guy peddling a unicycle and juggling GOP talking points to circus music in full clown regalia, while a mini-Karl Rove chatters around grinding an organ and holding out a cup. It doesn't matter if the clown falls off his unicycle over and over and drops all the talking points. Someone stage right-wing will throw him new talking points to juggle, and he'll just pretend they're the same ones he started with. It doesn't matter if the clown kills a few audience members in the process or sets the big tent on fire. None of that will be mentioned and the reviews will be rave.
Sean Hannity will note that the clown was wearing a yellow ribbon on his vest and the Rove monkey had a miniature Uncle Sam hat on, so critiquing the show is exactly like blowing up the Statue of Liberty and fragging our troops. Bill O'Reilly will angrily denounce anyone who doesn't agree with him that this is the greatest clown ever and the monkey is a super genius. Chris Matthews will say he really, really likes this Bozo personally. Joe Lieberman will be so smitten, he'll rush the stage with a dozen roses and kiss the clown on the lips. Straight talking Johnny McCain will flash a valium-esque smile at the clown and hug the monkey warmly while it takes a dump on his lap and smears shit all over his face. And an editorial written by a belt way democratic insider will warn us all that if we don't clap real loud and pretend it was a terrific show, the performer will turn into the Killer Klown From Outer Space and the monkey will prance around the stage menacingly in a parody of King Kong.
Traditional media is apparently still suffering under the misunderstanding that the WH clowns and the GOP monkeys hold any allure for the ticket buying public, and the pundits will even help keep the audience distracted when plates fall and pretend that any cluster-fuck is actually all part of that great show. Few talking heads will mention that it's the same show from last week, last month, last year. Hardly a one of them will question why, almost five years after 9-11, we're just now talking seriously about controlling our borders. In fact they'll all clap furiously at the clown show because if they give the clown bad reviews, the circus might not give them back-tent access to the performers. And then they might have to actually engage in, you know, journalism and reporting.
Here's an intervention shout-out to our esteemed media pundits and their handlers: You Don't Have To Cover for this Crappy Clown Show Any More. A White House with an 80% approval rating and a jazzy video-war in the works can play games with access and deal you out of the family Nielson if you don't play ball. But a beleaguered administration less popular than Tricky Dick, with shall we say a shrinking market share, and under assault from all sides, will eagerly wag their PR tail to the cadence of your agenda, because they desperately need to get their respective clowns on every dang channel juggling those talking points and riding that unicycle. If they don't get that organ grinder cranked up to deafening levels and put on a hell of a clown show, they know they don't have a chance of holding what's left of their admiring fans attention, let alone reversing the public's general malaise with clown shows and musical monkeys.
This isn't the greatest show on earth any longer. It really never was, that was just promotional hype anyway. And, unlike the old cliche, this show doesn't have to go on at all.
::
The only thing left out of this marvelous rant is who's pulling the strings. Who's sending the unicycle out and cranking up the organ? Or is the problem that the controller has moved on to another model?
Posted by Hannah at May 15, 2006 07:48 AM