January 09, 2005
Nanny-in-Chief
What I want to know is when George II turned into the Nanny-in-Chief, hectoring his charges as he herds them in this color-coded nursery-nation.
Did the events of September 11, 2001 bring about that transformation, or did we just fail to read the script?
How do we know now that we've entered the nanny state, you ask?
Let me just mention a couple of signs that tell us where we're at.
First, there are the fairytales we hear night and day about evil axes and evil doers and ever more horrible weapons, stored in large underground caverns and just waiting to be launched in our direction. Did the fairytales start before 9/11 or after? I can't even remember.
Then, of course, there are all those hightened "security" measures. Never mind that secure used to mean "locked-up," "tied-down" and "buckled-in." Oh, that's right, it still does. Only now, to make sure nobody's got anything to hide, if they want to go anywhere, they've got to be willing to empty their pockets, take off their shoes, turn around to be patted and allow even their insides to be inspected with x-ray machines.
No mere nanny could come up with more intrusive measures to keep her charges in check. Only the nanny-in-chief has such power. Of course color codes help.
The urge to inspect what people eat and drink and perhaps even sniff didn't just start with George II. But, it sure has gotten harder to cage a snack or a cig without being inspected by some video camera up there in the corner. Of course, that's just so the nanny doesn't actually have to be paying attention all the time. If something surprising does come up, big nanny will be able to check it out later. Like, for example, that tsunami wave. Having a picture makes it a lot easier to decide who deserves a hug and who doesn't.
Blowing Fallujans to smitherenes with big bombs, obviously doesn't count. That's not a fairytale we want to be told. Nor is it a once-in-a-lifetime hickup that throws planet Earth just a little off her path. Fallujah is a man-made reality and reality has no place in the nanny state. Maybe that explains why the only pictures of abuse we get to see were those that were staged to satisfy somebody's juvenile fantasies.
Who would have thought that when "The Nanny" went off the air, George II was just itching to take her place? Sad to say, the Nanny-in-Chief is no Fran Drescher.
Posted by Hannah at January 9, 2005 06:00 AM